Have you ever tried to engage in a conversation about God’s Word with someone who held a different view, only to be shot down before you even got started? I have – on more than one occasion!
I have discovered that taking an authoritative stance usually shuts down any further discussion. And interrupting is a huge mistake. So what should we do?
“Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone..” Colossians 4:5-6 Read full chapter
“Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,” 1Peter 3:15 Read full chapter
Greg Koukl, in his book TACTICS says this,
“Using simple leading questions is an almost effortless way to ease spiritual topics into a conversation…without seeming abrupt, rude, or pushy. Questions are engaging and interactive, probing yet amicable.”
Jesus often used questions in His interactions with a hostile crowd. Here are a few examples:
“I will also ask you a question. Tell me: John’s baptism—was it from heaven, or of human origin?” Luke 20:3-4
“He saw through their duplicity and said to them, “Show me a denarius. Whose image and inscription are on it?” Luke 20:23-24 Read full chapter
“Which is easier: to say to this paralyzed man, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up, take your mat and walk’?” Mark 2:9 Read full chapter
We can learn a lot about why a person believes what he does by asking questions. Most people are only too glad to have an opportunity to express their beliefs.
When you ask a question, you are showing interest in that person, and it’s an invitation to thoughtful dialog. Koukl suggests nicely asking questions like:
- How did you come to that conclusion?
- Why do you say that?
- I’m curious, What do you mean by that?
- What do you mean by (fill in the blank) evolution, evil, etc.
“It is not the Christian life to wound, embarrass, or play one-upmanship with colleagues, friends, or even opponents, but it’s a common vice that anyone can easily fall into.” Hugh Hewitt
I used to think that if the conversation didn’t go anywhere, the other person was just unreasonable. In other words, it was their fault we couldn’t have a friendly discussion. But now, I realize that it was really my fault because I didn’t know how to engage in a conversation with someone who has differing views. But I am learning.
The big takeaway for me was this: Instead of immediately correcting or quoting Scripture, ask questions. That way, you will have a better understanding of why they believe what they believe and where the weaknesses are in their viewpoint. I have barely touched the surface on what Koukl can teach us. I hope you will look at the free sample.
I highly recommend Greg Koukl’s book TACTICS. Read a sample HERE.
In His Love, Cindy
Would you like to learn more about Jesus? See my page Who Is Jesus?
“Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: May they prosper who love you.” Psalm 122:6
All Scripture is from the NIV unless stated otherwise.
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