I want to tell you about a time, not long ago, when I felt like God was far away.
I felt like my faith was losing steam and my zeal and enthusiasm for God were draining away.
Satan was putting doubts in my mind. I kept hearing this: “Who do you think you are?”
I couldn’t feel God. I didn’t feel like praying. I didn’t even feel like going to church. I didn’t feel like reading my Bible. I just wanted to watch TV, play games on my ipad, and eat junk food.
But instead, I did pray (although without emotion). I did go to church. I did read my Bible. And I continued to write my blog. I went through the motions; all the while Satan whispered lies in my ear. (Who do you think you are? You can’t write a Christian blog!) At the time, I was ashamed because I thought they were my thoughts!
But Jesus said, “When (Satan) lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44. Satan is also called the accuser of the brethren. (See Revelation 12:10)
But then God . . .
Then, in church, we sang, Jesus Draw Me Nearer by Keith Getty. As I sang the words, I knew God was explaining things to me.
May this journey bring a blessing,
May I rise on wings of faith;
And at the end of my heart’s testing,
With Your likeness let me wake.
God was testing my heart! I realized that God was making me stronger. If I lost all emotion, all feeling and joy, would I still pray? Would I still read His Word? Would I still serve Him?
Yes, Lord. I will. Let me pass the test. Make my heart pure. Make me strong.
Did God let Satan test me? I think He did. Once I realized that I was in a test, I became strong because I knew those thoughts of doubt were lies from Satan. I knew God wanted to make me stronger.
So the next time God seems far away or something happens that you don’t understand – maybe you’re taking the same test. Maybe God is making you stronger!
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4 NIV
“The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the heart.” Proverbs 17:3 NIV
I am thankful for my church and my pastors, especially my Minister of Music, Ricky Clark, who always seems to be leading us in a song that is straight from the heart of God.
With Love, Cindy
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